"Tumbling through the dust of the mortal world—who says that's any worse than pure cultivation up on a mountain?"
"The young master may be a mortal man, but who says you will accomplish less than cultivators like us?"
Sitting in the courtyard, Xiao Mo looked at the book in his hands, only to find he could not keep his mind on it.
The words Fuchen had spoken before she left kept drifting back into his head.
True enough.
Originally Xiao Mo had thought that since Ruxue refused to leave this time, he would simply talk her around, slowly.
Gradually persuade her to go, so that they could part with a smile, so that she could go up the mountain with an easy heart instead of staying by force and living with regret.
But after hearing what Fuchen had to say, his resolve had been shaken.
So I don't need to "drive" Ruxue away after all?
But is that really the right thing to do...
Ruxue is coming to rely on me more and more.
And I'm only a mortal man, good for scarcely a hundred years.
A hundred years from now, if Ruxue watches me pass away with her own eyes, could her Dao heart truly bear it?
"Xiao Mo."
"Xiao Mo!"
"Hey! Xiao Mo!"
Just as Xiao Mo sat there dazed, Bai Ruxue's little hand went waving back and forth in front of his eyes.
"Ruxue? What is it?" Xiao Mo came back to himself.
"I told you before—tomorrow I want to bring my little sister down the mountain. Is that really all right?" Bai Ruxue asked.
Xiao Mo nodded. "Of course it's all right."
"Then it's settled. I'll go fetch her tomorrow." Bai Ruxue said happily. "You're sure to like Xiaoqing."
"Mm." Xiao Mo smiled faintly, then sank back into thought.
Seeing him like that, Bai Ruxue could not help but pout. "Xiao Mo, what's the matter with you? Ever since you saw that Daoist nun off, you've been like a man who's lost his soul."
As she spoke, a strange light flashed through Bai Ruxue's peach-blossom eyes, and she backed away two steps in alarm. "Stinky Xiao Mo! Don't tell me you've taken a fancy to her?"
Xiao Mo rolled up his book and tapped the girl lightly on the head. "What are you imagining? No."
"Really no?" Bai Ruxue clasped her hands behind her back, bent low, and peered up at Xiao Mo from below.
Xiao Mo's gaze slipped by accident into the powdered peaks and snowy seas within the girl's collar, and he hurriedly looked away. "Truly no."
"Good." Bai Ruxue patted her high-rising collar. "You scared this young lady half to death."
"Then why do you look so down, Xiao Mo?" Bai Ruxue pressed on.
"It's nothing." Xiao Mo shook his head. "Don't worry about me."
Bai Ruxue pouted.
Seeing him like this, how could this snake not worry...
At noon, Bai Ruxue carried a pot of mutton stewed with radish and wolfberries out of the kitchen.
Every so often, Bai Ruxue would stew mutton for Xiao Mo.
At first Xiao Mo had no idea why, until he learned that Aunt Qian, chatting with Bai Ruxue, had once remarked, "Mutton is good for a man—it gives you more vigor after you eat it."
Bai Ruxue, not understanding, had taken it to mean "after eating mutton, you'll have more vigor for your studies."
Xiao Mo had not had the heart to correct her.
After lunch, Bai Ruxue washed the dishes and stepped out into the courtyard, where she found Xiao Mo sitting and staring into space.
Bai Ruxue washed the clothes and hung them out to dry in the courtyard; Xiao Mo was still staring into space.
When Bai Ruxue swept the courtyard, he was still at it.
The girl's eyes flickered. She lifted one small foot in its embroidered shoe and stepped on his foot—and he did not even react.
After dinner, Xiao Mo was still staring into space.
By now Bai Ruxue's soft pink cheeks were puffed out.
She did not like seeing Xiao Mo this way.
She only wanted to see Xiao Mo happy every day...
That evening, as night fell, Bai Ruxue seemed to hit upon a way to lift his mood, and she hurriedly caught Xiao Mo by the hand. "Xiao Mo, Xiao Mo, come with me..."
"Where to?" Xiao Mo asked.
"Somewhere. Somewhere that'll make you happy."
No sooner had she spoken than, without waiting for him to refuse, Bai Ruxue pulled him to his feet and headed out of the courtyard.
Bai Ruxue led Xiao Mo up the mountain, climbing higher and higher.
How long they walked, he did not know; at last she brought him to the summit.
By then the stars had filled the sky.
The mountain was so high that Xiao Mo seemed to be ringed by stars, standing in the midst of an entire river of them.
It was as though he need only reach out and close his hand to grasp all that scattered starlight.
"Well? Pretty, isn't it?" Bai Ruxue planted her hands on her hips, a little smug.
"Pretty it is," Xiao Mo nodded. "But why did you bring me here, Ruxue?"
"Because you're in a bad mood, of course."
Bai Ruxue pouted her little lips.
"Before I came down the mountain with you, whenever something upset me, I'd come here. As long as I shouted it out, I'd feel better right away. Though since I came down with you, I hardly ever come anymore."
"Why is that?"
"Because it takes more than two hours to get from the village to the summit—it's exhausting. So mostly I'd just cry on that rock over there, and cuss you out while I cried. Like last time."
Xiao Mo: "..."
"All right, all right, come on and try it." Bai Ruxue pulled him forward. "You have to shout it out loud, got it?"
"This seems a bit much..." Xiao Mo was a little embarrassed.
"What's so much about it? No one can hear. Watch me."
Bai Ruxue stepped forward, turned her back to Xiao Mo, faced the mountains, and shouted:
"Xiao Mo! You big stink-egg! Don't you dare turn your nose up at my cooking!"
"Xiao Mo! Stop studying! Come play with me..."
"Xiao Mo... You're not allowed to scold me, or I won't talk to you anymore."
"Xiao Mo! You're not allowed to marry any other girl! Do you hear me?"
"Xiao Mo! You have to cheer up, or else I'll be unhappy too!"
The girl's voice carried out from the mountain, and the echoes rolled among the ridges and peaks.
Watching her back, listening to her voice.
Every single thing she said had his name in it.
"That's about it..." Bai Ruxue turned around to look at Xiao Mo. "It really works."
Xiao Mo smiled faintly. "Never mind whether it works—why is it... all of it scolding me?"
Bai Ruxue rolled her eyes at him. "You big dummy, because you're the only one in my world."
Xiao Mo's expression froze for an instant, and a feeling he could neither name nor explain broke open inside his heart.
"Just follow your heart."
That one line of Fuchen's echoed again in Xiao Mo's mind.
His eyes gradually cleared, as though he had understood something.
Yes... follow my heart...
If she doesn't want to leave, why do I keep trying to send her away?
And even if I die a hundred years from now, so what?
At least, in these hundred years, I can stay by her side.
A hundred years from now.
I return to dust.
She ascends the immortal path.
"Come on and try it, it really works." Bai Ruxue tugged at Xiao Mo's wrist.
"Do I really have to shout?"
"You really do."
"Fine..." Xiao Mo looked out at the ridges and peaks under the moonlight, overcame the shame in his heart, took a deep breath, and bellowed, "A hundred years... is so short..."
"Huh?" Bai Ruxue blinked, then laughed out loud, bright as the tinkling of silver bells. "Xiao Mo, what kind of worry is that?"
She stepped up and stood beside him, facing the same direction, and shouted, "How is a hundred years short?! A hundred years is a really long time!"
"Silly..."
Xiao Mo turned his head and looked smilingly at the girl beside him.
A hundred years was truly very long, for a person.
But for you...
Truly, ever so short.