Qin Ming felt a splitting headache, as if a dull axe was chopping at his skull, making him feel like his brain was falling apart. His vision darkened and the pain almost caused him to faint.
He took a deep breath, but still couldn't control himself. He stumbled, his emotions in wild turmoil, like a fire raging inside him.
"Why did you do this to me?" he murmured through the agony. In the past, he had imagined many scenarios, but he never expected that his parents would want Cui Hong to treat him like this.
This feeling was like being slowly ripped apart at his very soul. His body trembled; it hurt even more than when the boy in feathered robes had broken his arm and smashed his skull with a purple-glimmering bamboo stick.
Qin Ming swayed backward, broken images flashing in his mind. No wonder, during his third rebirth, he had dipped his finger into the coarse tea to write a single character on the table: "Abandon."
Now, he recalled even more. Before he was found by the feathered-robed boy, while living in that peaceful village, he had silently scribbled that same character one night.
Until that village was suddenly swallowed by fire, invaded by a group of powerful experts, shouting and killing filling the air, he had remained silent, facing the calamity of life and death, calmly observing without uttering a word.
"At that time, did I no longer wish to speak? Did I have a premonition that something would happen? Was it extreme disappointment? Perhaps there was also sadness and loss," Qin Ming thought, enduring the intense pain in his head as if reopening a scar from his past, suffering anew.
He could clearly see that even when the fire almost engulfed him, there was no change in the expression on his face; in the end, he even seemed relieved, gazing at the distant horizon, watching the pitch-black night as if he had let go of everything completely.
"Did I feel a sense of liberation at the final moment? I had once imagined this, and when it actually came, I had already been able to face it calmly."
Qin Ming stood alone in the desolate landscape, his eyes red, looking back at himself from two years ago—in defiance, in anger, in grievance—an emotion bubbling up from deep within.
"Young master, Chong He, what’s wrong with you?" Cui Hong, worried by his state, wanted to approach.
"Don’t come any closer!" Qin Ming said in a low voice.
Before him lay endless flames, and just above him, a burning beam nearly crushed him. At that time, he truly didn't care about life or death.
Two years ago, he didn't know why he let out a final sigh in silence, as if putting everything behind him.
But now, he truly felt unwilling!
"Because that feathered-robed boy almost killed me, I've lost a great deal of memories. So now I can't let go of those past events? I just can't understand why I felt relieved on that night two years ago."
While standing in the desert, he recalled through the pain.
Certain fragmented images surged forth again, like a dense forest of long spears or a cold array of long knives, ruthlessly crashing through his mind, threatening to tear him apart.
Another night came to him: he saw many people.
These were earlier memories, before he met the feathered-robed boy; surrounded by a crowd, he was separating from the Cui family members.
Opposite him stood a middle-aged couple, watching as he boarded a bronze carriage marked with cloud patterns.
The man said nothing, his demeanor intimidating, his eyes seeming to look straight into one's heart, calmly watching him leave.
The woman was in her early thirties, adorned in luxurious palace attire, her hair styled high and fastened with a shimmering golden feather, her delicate face betraying no emotion as she watched Qin Ming depart.
Nearby, many elderly people exuded an abundant spirit, seemingly intimidated by the couple’s aura, keeping a respectful distance or finding it uncomfortable.
At that time, Qin Ming couldn’t help but look back, but all he saw were their departing silhouettes. The middle-aged couple had already taken their leave; he opened his mouth but didn’t utter a single word.
The images were fragmented and fuzzy, yet Qin Ming could vividly feel the intense emotional turmoil he had experienced, as if facing a life-altering separation—both reluctant and full of endless loss, mixed with a hint of resentment.
"Chong He, are you alright?" Cui Hong asked, concern now evident.
Qin Ming looked at him and said, "I'm actually doing well now. If you hadn't shown up again, it would have been even better!"
The pain in his head had lessened. He touched his face and discovered tear stains, having no idea when they had fallen. Feeling vexed, he wiped them away.
These cheap liquids had no place in his current self; the past was long gone and should be discarded. What was there to cry about?
Qin Ming's expression remained unchanged as he said, "I've always thought I had done something wrong in the past, but now I can confirm that I owe you nothing, and I have not let down the Cui family. Yet you come to me once more; what more do you want?"
Cui Hong said, "I came here seeking the Yinyang Elixir and, more importantly, to discuss your matters. Arrangements are being made, and people will protect you. You don’t need to venture out into the dangers of the world."
"You think a single sentence from you can ruin my future?!" Qin Ming's gaze turned sharp and even a bit red. He had experienced so much, faced severe injuries, and bled, wandering through icy desolation like a beggar. If it weren’t for the people of Shunshun Village bringing him back, he would have died long ago.
Now, with just a light comment, they wished to bind him to this remote land. Why? Everything he had achieved came from his own efforts in the mountains, without taking a single resource from the Cui family.
Cui Hong fell silent again, feeling guilty and reluctant, but this was his duty. If he did not complete it, how could he return?
After a long time, he seriously spoke, "Chong He, you’ve likely switched to the local rebirth method, right? After all, without guidance, the methods from the silk scrolls cannot be practiced anymore. The local rebirth methods do not have any remarkable aspects, and reaching the final stage yields little success.
Even if you try your best, you would only become a master in such a small place. If you truly wish to venture out, it will lead to a bleak future. Outside, you would not be considered a shining strong figure.
Therefore, wouldn’t it be better for you to sever ties with the path of rebirth now? You could then live a safe and prosperous life here, with people to protect and care for you. What could be wrong with that?"
Qin Ming felt a surge of anger within him. His path, his life, why should they arrange it for him?
He asked, "If I choose to pursue rebirth—whether it's the method from the silk scrolls or another form—you will certainly stop me and act against me, right?"
Cui Hong remained silent.
"My parents' decision..." Qin Ming gazed at the dark desert. Amidst the endless fury, he also felt a profound sense of helplessness.
All those tortures from the past had forced him to confront death; he had even almost died once. Yet he had never felt fear, but the knife of familial affection caught him off guard.
Despite the many fragmented scenes, scattered and missing parts, Qin Ming had vaguely deciphered something from that character "Abandon"—a pawn in a game. No matter how he looked at it, it left him breathless; right now, he couldn't find peace.
He could be sure of one thing: not only had he not wronged the Cui family, but he had also risked his life, narrowly escaping death, only to be sent to this remote place.
Flames burned before Qin Ming's eyes, blurring images flashing before him. He increasingly believed that many in the Cui family had known in advance what would happen that night.
"Did they cast me away to evade disaster?"
Yet he couldn’t understand. Having fallen to such a state, why did his parents, specifically, still act this way?
What he once thought were illusions began to feel real. How desperate had he been to think that life was merely a facade, pieced together, for some of his beliefs had crumbled.
Cui Hong said nothing as he stepped forward, his heart filled with sorrow but still preparing to act.
"Can you tell me everything I’ve been through?" Qin Ming suddenly spoke, pointing to his head. "You must have witnessed everything that night. My skull was shattered three times by that feathered-robed boy. I’ve forgotten so much. Even if you want to take action, let me leave with some clarity."
"What?" Cui Hong’s expression changed drastically, filled with surprise, guilt, and remorse. "I didn’t know; you've lost your memory. This is our fault—we should have arrived sooner. I apologize, young master, Chong He."
His emotions shifted many times. "Chong He, I did not come here to kill you; I merely wanted to erase your path of rebirth. After this, no one will target you again. You can marry and raise a family here, free from conflict!"
"How is that any different from killing me? I want to walk my path of rebirth; this is my own chosen future. On what grounds do you want to cut it off?" Qin Ming exclaimed. "I’ve already forgotten the past—only fragmented memories remain. What are you still worried about?"
"How can this be?!" A startled voice came from the edge of the desert, along a rugged path, where Li Qingyue, dressed in feathers, appeared.
Beside her were her maid and two armored men, along with the new lord of Chixia City, Meng Xinghai.
Silence enveloped the desert.
Cui Hong did not retreat, watching the boy ahead.
Qin Ming realized they were finally going to act. He declared, "My small family, my neighbors—an ordinary couple could care for their children well, full of warmth and love, willing to protect them with their lives. A thousand-year-old family? After this, we shall have no more connections. Let it end here."
At that moment, a voice within Qin Ming softly sighed, telling him that everything had passed. Those were his parents, and he should no longer hold onto resentment. What he gave was only right. He should set off on his journey and leave it all behind.
Yet now, he shook his head, unable to remain calm.
"I’ve died once. From now on, I am no longer Cui Chong He. The one who lives again is Qin Ming. From this moment on, I want to live only for myself!" Qin Ming shouted loudly in the desert.