Fortunate Events

Chapter 32 Absurd Firefighting

8 min read

While one hot-headed noble son was busily adding fuel to the fire at Qishen’s Qifang Garden, trying to fight fire with fire, Lu Qin had already slipped into Si Ji Ward.

Right by the western main street beside Qifang Garden, Lu Qin, along with Luo Qingzhou and a dozen or so generals, officers, strongmen, and prison keepers from the Royal Guard, managed to sneak in close to a thousand people.

The young lords and ladies of Si Ji Ward refused to let any official Da Yin forces enter.

So, except for Lu Qin who was already in plain clothes, Luo Qingzhou and company operated efficiently, smashing open the doors of over a hundred households nearby, forcibly “requisitioning” a group of commoners disguised as civilians to help them blend in.

Around Qifang Garden, chaos reigned.

The several neighboring estates adjacent to Qifang Garden had young nobles bustling about with large groups of guards and servants, busy moving their belongings.

They brought out precious gold, silver, and fine goods, but tossed beds, wardrobes, and other less valuable furniture straight into the inferno.

Lu Qin could hear clearly a few nobles wearing splendid robes standing on the street, proudly scheming how to report their losses for reimbursement the next day.

“This fire is obviously due to the incompetence of officers from the Honglu Temple and the Fengtiao Ward’s officials.”

“Exactly! They must shoulder the blame for this!”

“Ugh, those thirty thousand bolts of premium silk just delivered to my household were burnt to ash in this fire!”

“Hah, what’s thirty thousand bolts of silk? My family sent me one hundred thousand bolts of jacquard brocade just before the New Year.”

“Oh wow, you brothers sure are loaded. Then, it's only fair I claim my loss of fifty thousand baskets of the finest tribute tea, right?”

“Tsk tsk, it’s heartbreaking. My uncle just gifted me a thousand bear pelts, three thousand tiger pelts, eight thousand leopard pelts, twenty thousand fox pelts, and other assorted furs — worth over two million guan in total.”

Lu Qin grimaced.

These spoiled brats talk about tens of thousands of bolts of silk and brocade, tens of thousands of baskets of tea, and tens of thousands of lengths of fur.

Even if their estates are splendid and exquisite, there’s no way they could store that much!

One young lord from the southern barbarians, heavily tattooed all over, rode atop a strange horned blue ox, clad in full armor, waving a terrifying spine cane—about eight meters long, dyed a blood-red color, covered with thumb-sized lumps all over.

He shouted loudly in excitement, stomping around: “Firefighters! Firefighters! Hehe, Young Lord Dong Qi Bo, you’re our good friend!”

“Hurry, hurry, put out the fire!”

This young lord shouted a few times.

His guards and servants had already thrown tens of thousands of catties of kindling wood and thousands of catties of grease directly into Qifang Garden’s flames.

He patted the blue ox beneath him and galloped over to several young nobles busy planning their compensation claims and made a respectful bow.

“Brothers, you can’t just stand there idle.”

“Hurry up and divert the fire to your own estates, or how will you report your losses tomorrow?”

“Remember, my current courtyard’s ground is too small. I stashed tens of thousands of catties of rare medicinal herbs in your estates.”

Several young nobles laughed together.

They each returned the bow, grinning: “Hahaha, let’s all get rich together!”

Behind Lu Qin and the others, across the street from Qifang Garden in another estate’s small building, a girl dressed in sky-blue silk ranted, gesturing wildly: “Hey! You bunch of scoundrels, do you really think Qi Shen died in the fire? He still owes me three hundred guan from a bet!”

Laughter broke out from neighboring buildings.

“If the man’s dead, debts die with him. Flower Sister, why bother over just three hundred guan?”

“Hey, did you hear who Qi Shen’s been messing with lately? How’d someone just barge in and start killing and burning?”

“What’s that? You feel sorry for him? Brother, I can tell you like that kind of thing.”

“Bullshit! I’m just worried he didn’t die! See my broken front tooth? It’s from a fight I had with him over drinks before New Year’s. That bastard’s no gentleman—he actually threw a wine bowl at me when I was bare-handed!”

Around, noise and chaos, roaring laughter, name-calling, and curses buzzed like a million flies.

Lu Qin was so overwhelmed he couldn’t help but click his tongue in disbelief.

He had never seen such spoiled hostage nobles before.

Luo Qingzhou’s expression was grim.

He whispered sharply, “Qi Shen must not die... That ghost woman just said this fire has something to do with them. Qi Shen is tangled up with those ghost women’s affairs.”

“Qi Shen must live. I want his testimony!”

Behind the scenes, a group of plainclothed Royal Guard members stood dazed, staring around.

The streets were crowded with onlookers.

Most of the hostages in Si Ji Ward had brought their people to watch the spectacle.

Like the noble who shouted before, they all secretly hoped Qi Shen would not die—after all, if he did burn down now, during the New Year, how satisfying and entertaining that would be!

In Haojing, the son of Lord Dong Qi had been burned to death—tsk tsk—another major upheaval for the court to deal with.

Who knew how many would suffer or be demoted.

These hostages were confined in Haojing, living lives of endless feasting and drunken debauchery, utterly bored.

A grand spectacle like this? They wouldn’t miss a second.

So some threw firewood and grease onto Qifang Garden.

Some stirred up the surrounding chaos, laughing merrily as they watched.

Others whispered sarcastically, cursing Qi Shen to burn soon.

Not one cared to help put out the fire!

Luo Qingzhou wanted a live Qi Shen.

If that was so, Royal Guard personnel had to charge into the blaze to rescue him.

But judging by the current mood, who would dare rush into Qifang Garden amidst all these furious crowds? They’d likely be attacked from every side.

With so many hostages—anywhere from dozens to over a hundred—each protected by guards, if they ganged up, the Royal Guard present wouldn’t be enough to fight them all off.

Luo Qingzhou gripped his waist again and again.

He desperately wanted to draw his sword and break into Qifang Garden but seeing the fanatical hostages all around, his courage crumbled instantly.

“Find a way. Qi Shen must not die,” Luo Qingzhou ground out through clenched teeth.

He threw the responsibility to two subordinate generals and a group of officers beside him.

They all looked at each other with furrowed brows—no one could come up with a solution.

The hostages around, spurred on by the raging fire, were like rabid dogs.

Look at those few planning their compensation claims earlier—they were ordering their guards and servants to torch their own estates.

These estates belonged to Honglu Temple anyway; a fire that burned them to the ground wouldn’t cost them a single coin!

Others living further away were just as eager and were calling their people to prepare torches and oil.

Lu Qin cleared his throat softly and said in a low voice to Luo Qingzhou, “General, I just thought of a way, maybe...”

Luo Qingzhou and the generals quickly turned to Lu Qin.

“If your plan works, I’ll credit you with great merit!”

Lu Qin nodded and squeezed into the crowd, coming close to a group of rowdy, whistling hostages and guards.

Then he shouted at the top of his lungs:

“Hey! Burning Qi Shen to death would be too easy, don’t you think?”

“Why don’t we band together to fight the fire and save Qi Shen? Let him owe us a life debt!”

“A drop of kindness deserves a fountain of return!”

“If we all save Qi Shen, wouldn’t he owe us millions and millions?”

Several flushed, obviously drunk hostages abruptly turned, eyeing Lu Qin.

“This fellow’s new around here, but well said!”

“But Qi Shen doesn’t have that much money, does he?”

Several hostages looked at Lu Qin hopefully.

Lu Qin shouted again, “Qi Shen may not have money, but his father Dong Qi Bo sure does... Force Qi Shen to sign an IOU. If he can’t repay, make his father pay!”

A woman’s voice rang from a distance, “What if his father refuses?”

Lu Qin laughed loudly, “Then, send word to each of your fathers! Together we beat his father! No money? Then use mines, farmlands, forests, or pastures to repay!”

Lu Qin rallied his energy, using the mighty Canghai Qi to amplify his voice, his booming words echoed across the nearby streets.

Suddenly, complete silence.

Then, countless hands clapped and cheered in unison:

“That brother speaks well, truly insightful!”

“Break into the estates! Put out the fire! Save the man!”

“Hehe, make Qi Shen sign the IOU! Ha! That dog life of his? Worth ten million guan!”

“Nonsense! How dare you downgrade Brother Qi’s value like that? The most favored son of Lord Dong Qi Bo, worth at least thirty million!”

“You’re all talking crap! A hundred million guan! If Qi Shen refuses to sign, we all bash him to death!”

Chaos erupted.

Hundreds of hostages stomped and laughed uproariously.

One by one, incoherent orders spread in every direction.

Swarms of guards and servants shouted their slogans, wielding wooden logs acting as battering rams, pounding the walls of Qifang Garden with loud crashes.

Gardens like Qifang were high-end inns prepared for these hostages—exquisitely built, but with little defense.

With over a thousand people working together on all sides, the walls soon began to collapse with loud crashes.

Many skilled guards hurried over to the eastern canal, smashed through over two-foot-thick river ice, lifting massive blocks and hurling them into the raging inferno at Qifang Garden.

More and more servants fetched well water bucket by bucket, dousing the fire from all directions.

Within just half an incense stick’s time, the flames inside Qifang Garden were subdued by more than half.

On the fake mountain behind the garden, the guards furiously battering the flower hall’s main gate screamed hysterically:

“Help! Help!”

“My young lord’s possessed by a ghost!”

“Save him! Save him!”

“My prince is inside! My Lancang Prince is inside!”

“Come and save our prince... He will reward you richly!”

Growing tumult rang all around.

Luo Qingzhou and company paled visibly.

The Lancang Prince is the Emperor’s own uncle—how could he be inside Qifang Garden?

In the next instant, a bloodcurdling scream from the flower hall shattered the air like a pig being slaughtered:

“Help! Sister Qi Fei has turned into a ghost!”

(End of Chapter)